Trees don’t struggle to keep their leaves when autumn arrives, nor do they resist new growth in spring. But, resistance to change is how we sometimes or often approach our lives and experiences.
Life asks—insists really, that we engage a continuous shedding and new growth aspect. Maybe you’re trying to hang onto something it’s time to let go of or trying to change something not ready to shift just yet.
Everything that comes to us really does have a reason, as difficult as it sometimes is to perceive or believe. Even some of the most painful, frustrating, and scary moments have eventually made sense at some later time—have shown some purpose in my life and in the greater tapestry I’m part of. Like when a personal or professional relationship ends, only to see days, months, or years later that what happened was actually order demonstrated within what felt like chaos initially or even for a while longer.
Every change that’s happened or happens in my life is eventually revealed as an intricate, integral aspect of something larger—something only a Higher Mind could orchestrate with such precision and wisdom, whether we attribute that wisdom to our soul self or Source or the partnership that exists between them. Pain and struggle felt after events have happened, felt that way because I temporarily disconnected from absolute trust in Source (and sometimes in myself), a trust that has been demonstrated as worthy and worth it more times than it seems it should take for an individual to finally accept and allow that everything has a reason.
Everything also has a season. How often have you relied on something for a while only to see it diminish or begin to show signs of this, and you tried to cling to it as though it were permanent, or should be? When something is shed or removed from our life, it means that something else is coming our way; something desires to open, expand, renew, or be created.
Look at your life right now and notice what, as the Native American phrase goes, has stopped “growing corn” for you, or you’re aware that it’s heading that way. I bet you can think of at least one aspect of your life this applies to, just as I can. Sometimes we think we are obligated to hold on when we are actually obligated to let go in order to look after our best interests and well-being, or look toward where and how we are to grow next. People, things, and events come into our life for a reason and a season, though the season may be brief or long and the reason unclear, until it’s time for us to understand it differently.
When you see that a season for something in your life is approaching its end, that’s the time to envision the next phase or realize you’re at a crossroads, and that it’s time to give what’s next real consideration. Often, because we tend to hang on to things when their season is waning, or even over, we ignore the fact that we’re being nudged or kicked in the backside to not only embrace the fact of forthcoming change but get involved with it so we have as much influence as possible about how we experience what comes next.
Whenever the stream or streams you rely on show signs of drying up or changing course, for a reason or a season, you can consider one of these approaches:
1. Is it time to find a new stream? Perhaps you’re being nudged toward growth and newness, and a new right-for-you stream is elsewhere. You need to go there, where you find fresh, flowing waters. The reason your stream dries up or changes course is because you might not make the move you need to unless this happens. You may feel like you’re being punished or penalized. You aren’t; you’re being motivated to grow.
2. Maybe there’s a better way, an innovation, you haven’t thought of or tried yet. One tweak or even a small shift in one direction or another may make all the difference.
3. Maybe it’s about looking for what blocks the stream, like limiting beliefs or negative thinking or fear of change, so you can begin a process that lets the metaphorical waters flow again. (An empowering book that can help is Feel the Fear…and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers.)
Sometimes we attempt to make a change happen before its time. This can feel frustrating, like we’re spinning our wheels, when we’ve simply shown up for our appointment a bit too early. It’s like getting to the restaurant far earlier than you can be seated or before other members of your party arrive. The wait feels different than if you arrived on time or together.
There’s another aspect to this. Have you ever had the feeling that something you’re about to do isn’t as “right” as it might be, or you feel hesitation? That’s your intuition communicating with you. If you’re headstrong or so focused on easing a fear, pain, or frustration with an action, you may ignore that inner nudge. I’m not saying I get this right every time, but I more often than not get that nudge and pause, like when I’m about to send an e-mail I’m eager to get out and that twinge comes to me. I have to be willing to trust that my inner wisdom and guidance wants me to pay attention to something; and when I listen I see why the signal was sent. It’s also important to discern if it’s a true intuitive nudge or a fear based on a self-worth or confidence issue.
You’ve heard it before: A vacuum is created so there’s room to fill it with something else, or something better, but always something that contributes to our life experience in a meaningful way. How quickly we open to seeing it this way has all to do with how long we choose to struggle with the transition. This doesn’t mean we are obligated to “like” all change that happens; but just as forgiveness is really about setting us free, understanding this reason-and-season fact can help us find serenity that results from trust in Source, and in ourselves, when inner storms happen. You can also adopt the mindset that everything that happens is a win for you because it’s an opportunity to learn and grow. You can deliberately look for the potential benefits.
Maybe it’s time for you to give thought to which streams in your life supply you with energy and life force, which don’t, and which need adjustment so they flow smoothly and abundantly again. As the saying from an unknown author goes, “The pathway is smooth. Why do you throw rocks before you?” Put this kind of consideration into practice and see where or how it leads you. It’s a good practice, one you’ll appreciate.
Joyce L. Shafer is a Life Empowerment Coach dedicated to helping people feel, be, and live their true inner power. She’s author of “I Don’t Want to be Your Guru, But I Have Something to Say” and other books/e-books, and publishes a free weekly online newsletter that offers empowering articles. See all that’s offered by Joyce and on her site at http://stateofappreciation.weebly.com